What does being successful mean? For many people it is about what visible assets and toys they have – the flash house, whether it has a swimming pool or games room, the new car, the boat, the ski trips, the holidays overseas. Then there are the less visible but still materialistic things, the shares, how many directorships or other status positions they hold.

 However, all of these things can disappear overnight. All it needs is for a natural catastrophe or the financial market to crash and then what happens to success?

I see success as being more personal and measurable in terms of how strong your personal relationships are with family, friends and colleagues.

Do people like you? Do they want to hang out with you because they like your company? Liking is different from loving, but just as important. It is good relationships that contribute hugely to our happiness and contentment.

We also need to know how to look after ourselves as well as looking after others. Self-care is really important. We are no good to anyone else or to ourselves if we are collapsing with exhaustion or getting ill all the time. We don’t have to be a fitness freak or fanatical about our diet, but we do need to have enough exercise and a reasonably healthy diet, as well as enough sleep.

We need to leave a space in our lives for doing things that bring us pleasure and satisfaction.   They can be solitary activities or something you do with others. They could be sporting activities, crafts or any number of other things. Different things appeal to different people.

To be successful we need to have a sense of purpose and meaning in our lives, to be able to pursue activities that support that sense of purpose and meaning. Random acts of kindness that produce a smile are just as important as getting more public recognition for bigger actions. Results that we can see, encourage us to keep the sense of purpose and meaning alive.

Resilience and courage– they go together, and we can’t find success if we don’t have these. Life isn’t a smooth road. There are few, if any, people who have never had some crisis or other. Courage is not about not being scared. Courage is about sizing up the situation, assessing the risks and then taking action even when we are scared silly. If you are not scared, then it takes no courage to face something. Resilience is about being able to dig deep and come back again to deal with whatever has happened – to keep on going when it’s really tough - to not get bogged down by the problems or the times we have failed to find a solution, but to keep the focus on finding the right solution.

Finally, success depends on finishing what is started. Successful people don’t have a garage (or sewing room or any other place!) full of unfinished projects. Cluttered workspaces reflect a cluttered mind. Thinking clearly helps success to come your way.